I'll be happy when I get my New Mexico garage cleaned up.
I know I’m feeling better when I start to believe that cleaning out my closet will actually change my life. Or, if I get my office straightened and organized – I will then be in the position to rule the world. But when I’m feeling down, I have the over-powering, pervasive feeling that none of that would make a damn difference. It’s just stuff, stuff that just keeps me busy.
It’s curious, though, that I associate “feeling good,” with believing in something. Even if it’s a naïve belief like – the right protein powder in my shake might change the way I feel about my entire life.
There’s always something that we want, and think will make our lives better – clothes, money, job, a relationship… It’s the – if only I could have “this,” or “that” syndrome. I always said that if you really want to test what someone is made of – give them what they want. If they attain their treasured fame and fortune, it takes away their excuse for why their life is not working. They lose their belief that some “thing” will make their life better. That’s tough.
Many of us strive to “be in the moment,” and live, what Oprah calls, “authentic lives,” but we still always have our eye on the prize, even if the prize is – “being in the moment,” and living our “authentic lives.” It’s in our nature to “want,” and strive for that.
I think if we were looking down at our species from another planet, we’d probably remark how very industrious humans are. Even if it’s someone sitting, strung out on a couch, thinking, “If I get another fix, I’ll be fine.” Or, “Big Bang Theory” is coming the TV in ten minutes (my mom’s favorite), I gotta be ready.
Hmm. Looks like it feels nice, doesn't it? Yes, sure did.
I used to be very Spartan about being attached to things. I knew that “things” did not supply the meaning in life, and I put my money where my mouth was in that regard. I was long into adulthood before I learned how to shop, and, trust me, I can now shop with the best of them. But still, the things that matter most in life, you can’t buy at any store. And when my husband got sick with a deadly cancer, one of the first thoughts was – if you don’t have your health, you don’t have anything. It’s a great leveler.
Just recently I have been going through a few rough and emotional days, and a friend of mine called and said, “I’m sending you a happy box.” “Oh, really?” I replied, not knowing whether to jump up and down, or not. I know this friend has an incredibly generous heart; I also heard her mentioning that she might be purging her closet.
So, two days later, the parcel arrives, a big parcel. And I decided to open it…all the while thinking (very sadly) about how “things” were not really going to make me happy, and there were probably nice “things” in this box, but…
And then I pulled out a pair of Dolce Gabanna, Black Satin, Thigh-High Boots. After my mouth fell open, I burst out laughing. Laughing! How could I not! My friend…oh, man, she got me. She got me good!!
And it wasn’t the only thing in the box… There were other shoes buried in there, but the next thing I pulled out was a pair of Bright Red Satin, Thigh-High Boots! Holy…RED!
So, the rest of my night is put on hold while I try on all this footwear. And in pulling on the exquisite red boots, came the thought – what will I wear these with?? These boots are beautiful and bold. I have to wear something that lives up it. But…what do I dare? And where will I wear them?
These boots deserve a name, like the "Roadrunners," or "Flamin' Mamas"
And then came the mind-bending thought – Who will I be if I wear these big, bold, and beautiful boots? Certainly not the depressed, worn-out widow that’s slumped in her chair at home! And then I get what my dear friend is doing. She is diabolical – she is not going to let me stay home and wilt away. She is hitting me with retail therapy in the biggest, and most challenging way she could think of.
And it worked.
As much as we know “things” don’t really make a difference, the honest fact is – we like pretty things. Clever things. Shoes, beautiful clothes, beautiful people, smiles, impressive cars, and fascinating gadgets. We’ve always been attracted to these things, along with good food, the touch of silky fur, and the smell of a good horse.
I remember taking off in our plane early one morning, and our flight instructor and mentor, Captain Frank, was sitting in the cockpit with me. The sun was just starting to come up over the horizon, and it was breathtaking. Captain Frank smiled with contentment, and said, “Makes it all worth it, doesn’t it?” I was so impressed that this thirty-six thousand hour+ airline captain still appreciated a good sunrise after having seen thousands.
But you know… Cavemen were marveling at the same sunrises in the same way, thousands and thousands of years ago. And if Dolce Gabbana boots had been in existence then – there would have been women who would have killed for them.
I’m going to the ballet tonight. And I’m thinking – I’m wearing the black satin.
Great boots Lisa ,you go girl !
p.s. glad to see we all have stuff other than our cars in the garage…lol
Lisa, I know I’ve told you over and over, but I just LOVE reading your blogs! I couldn’t thank you enough for posting them and sharing your life with us. And, this blog I can definitely relate to…especially the “if only I could have “this,” or “that” syndrome.” I’ve always been told that material things only bring happiness for a brief period of time, and it’s the things money can’t buy that touch your heart and fulfill your life the most. And, I have found that to be true. But…sometimes…those material things sure do make a lasting impression, right? By the way, I’m 22 and haven’t learned how to shop…I think it’s because I hate trying on clothes?! Haha!
Anyways, I hope you have an amazing week…you deserve it! And, just like your Buddy said, you are sweet and beautiful…so…pull those Flamin’ Mamas out of the closet and rock ’em! 😉
BTW, Lisa, you are always in my thoughts and prayers.
And, as always, much love to you! XX
PS. Great picture of you and Patrick…SO sweet and full of love.
Have fun too …
puts a picture of you ready
Hi Lisa,
Life is a gift and the memories we make along the way. BTW I like flamin mamas:) Thanks for sharing. Pam
Flamin’ Mamas it is!
Lisa, What a smile this put on my face! I could just see you opening that box and seeing those boots. 🙂 You’re lucky in that you have legs that would actually look good in those boots! Wherever you wear them, have fun.
I have days like you mentioned where you feel that nothing you do will make any difference in your mood or your life. Sometimes it takes a huge effort to get myself out of that “pit”.
I know what you mean. There should probably be a “reality” contest that, instead of jumping off towers and things, the contestants should do one positive action during a day when they are really hurting and depressed. I can hear the crowd cheering them on now! Yes! Yes! Yes!
Hi Lisa…Love your blog…what a terrific friend you are blessed with….like Lindsay said…put on those boots and rock on!!
As much as it helps you, to put these feelings out there… you are helping others. It’s a two way street. The boots are great, and it’s time to put them on. Be confident, funky and free and LAUGH. Creating a new normal is rough sometimes… and it’s friends like yours that show you the way.
Dear Lisa,
What a gift !Those shoes are beautiful and i´m sure will suits you very much.The black ones are perfect and the red ones, too very high- class.
I know that expansive things can´t give back to you what you have lost but it can makes you a day a little more happy and it can help you forget your sadness….
I hope you will enjoying the balet tonight and you will recount it later!
Have fun, sending you hugs and love
Hey Lisa, Did you wear them? Lorna.xx
i did, but I need a shooorrter skirt to make them really work. More pushing the limits of the comfort zone!
Lisa what a beautiful blogentry…i wud have burst out laughin too with tears at the same time coz someone took their time for me our most precious gift! U are a very smart woman i look up to. We all got our truths n beliefs in ourselves n we shud live them without feelin guilty:-) thx for carrying on such a beautiful blog n rock these beautiful boots without third thoughts u know? Much luv
I had a good time read this blog!
Ha!, your friend got you! 😀
That’s what friends are for, isn’t it?
Good friends see behind the eyes, they understand the soul behind the mask.
Are they not the daily things that makes our life worth living? :-))
I am very lucky that I have such wonderful, caring friends.
I know the feeling of buying things to help fill the hole a loved one has left. When I lost my only daughter at the age of 18, I would shop & buy things I had no use for, but still I bought. It took a long time before I realized that things do not take the place of that loved one. It has been a long time since she passed away, but I still am trying to fill that hole. I guess we all, who have lost a loved one, need to realize that it will always be there no matter what you buy, do, or where you go, it might help for a while, but the emptiness keeps coming back. So we need to ask God to help us each and every day for the strength to go on with out them, believe me it is hard for me as I am sure it is hard for others. I pray you can find some peace in something you do Lisa that will help you each and every day, till it is time for you to be with Patrick. God Bless.
Sometimes it helps to laugh, and enjoy. If only for a little while. But it’s so true – it doesn’t fill that hole. But we do what we can sometimes!
I am LOVING your Flamin’ Mamas 🙂 And you are right, stuff doesn’t make your life better but it sure makes certain moments better. You have a great friend there!
Good Morning Lisa,
Seeing you sitting on the your ATV in your garage and hearing how you were down the last couple of days makes me want to hug you. I know that feeling that you have to clean and organize and probably get rid of some of the things that you no longer feel you need. But when you go to do that there is something that stops you in your tracks when you run into something your loved one used a lot or bought becaues they thought they needed it only to just end up storing it in the garage. It took me a long, long time to actually clean out things and only when I had to give up our farm did I really let things go because I really needed the money for my new apt. I had lost all my horses and I could no longer keep up with the 6 acre farm where we lived by myself. But with the help of my family and friends they got me thru it and we would laugh at some of the junk I was holding onto. I love your blogs because they touch on feeling that to this day I still feel and it will be 7 years in May for me. I went to a hockey game this weekend and really enjoyed myself because a friend insisted that I go. Thank God for friends who know you in and out. Just like your friend who sent you those wonderful and beautiful boots. You are still a beautiful lady and I am sure Patrick would go Ohh La La if he saw you struting around in those boots. (I would kill myself with heels that high at my age anymore LOL. ) but dress up and feel good and forget your sorrows for a while. Try to do anything that will lift your spirits. Too bad those boots don’t have a cowboy heel on them they would look great over a neat pair of jeans while riding your beautiful animals in the New Mexico landscape.
Have a Blessed Day Lisa and I hope your spirits soar!
Thank you, Rudi.
Great blog – I am currently being the couch person on the weekends, I had been so busy prior to and post Ed’s death, because I think all of our friends knew they had to keep my busy – but that has kind of worn off. I just hit the 6 month mark and it seems just as difficult now as the day he left us. So reading things like this definately helps. I’m glad to know that it’s “normal” to still be feeling so much saddness and grief. In other words, I need to find my proverbial “boots”. I know I have to get back out there – in the single world – not the “couple” world that I have found myself so wrapped up in over the past few years.
The boots are completely awesome by the way.
Hope you enjoyed your night out… Agree with other poster – let’s see a picture of the finished look prior to the ballet.
Peace, MK
I think we do things when ready. And yeah, sometimes we have to force ourselves, but even so, I think we have a sense when we need to do that.
FYI things got a lot worse for me at the six month mark. It’s like the “stunned” quality wore off, reveal the real pain that was underneath. There’s only “up” from here, right? Slowly, but surely.
Hi Lisa
Love the 2 pairs of out of this world boots especially the red ones, see there is magic out there, these red boots really have it made you wow over them and think what do you wear with them?
Your friends seem to be great they know how to keep you on track, pleased that they are there for you, as special friends like this are far and few, you treasure them Lisa as they are your tonic to help you in times of depression that can creep up on you with out you realising.
Great to read your blogs again you have real magic in your fingers, you just know how to put your feelings down beautifully you take care love to you and God bless love Julie xxx
Dear Lisa,
I really love your blog and I think that it is ok to have fun with material things, to be grateful to have the opportunity to afford them. It is not important what comes from the outside, but sometimes the things from the outside help the inside to feel good – sometimes.
I love your shoes and your thoughts about good food and all the beautiful stuff that women love but thinking about the feeling of silky fur makes me sad and angry when the fur is without the animal that owns it. You love animals, you treat your own very well, please don’t make commercial for wearing fur – after all that I have read from you I have to say: this “pair of shoes” should not go out with you, it’s not fitting you. Better wear the flamin mamas with whatever you’ll find in the mall – you don’t need to wear someone else’s skin, your own is beautiful enough!
Best wishes from Tani
I don’t wear fur. I prefer it on the animal it belongs to. That’s just me.
And yes! I think sometimes we need to relax and ENJOY the things life brings us. Life’s too short to be so serious about everything.
You are so damn right! We have like Carrie said in one episode: “the right for shoes” And we should wear them and get dressed up like queens, because sometimes we need to escape from ourselves and we need to feel pretty. It’s maybe like beeing an actor, you play something that you’re not and when the nights over and you’re getting rid of all the jewellery and the makeup you are finding back to yourself with the difference that you have new strength for the upcoming day.
Tanja
Hello Lisa,
WOW beautiful boots. a great Pictures from you and Patrick is so amazing 🙂
much fun this evening.
Love and Light
Simone
Please don’t get me wrong, I really love your thoughts, the honesty behind your words, but I can’t stand fur… It’s important that we all learn to say no to things we don’t really need, it’s important to avoid pain and cruelty, and fur contains all of that. People tend to forget things, we collect them in our garage or save habits in a secret place in our brain. We need to clean out not only our material stuff, we should think over some forgotten but still alive habits. Wearing fur was important 30000 years ago, but now it is only a selfish habit which should be thrown away with the garage stuff.
Tanja
Ha! When I was talking about the touch of silky fur, I was talking about the luscious fur on my kitty’s back! Just like the wonderful smell that a living, breathing “live” horse has. Rest assured, I much prefer my fur on the backs of live animals!
🙂 Ha, you got me ! I needed to read this part of the blog a few times and because you wrote about beautiful women stuff I thought that you mean fur to wear…! I’m glad that you love the same fur that I love (and as a cat owner you have fur on you clothes anyway without killing them 😉
Thank you for your answer, I couldn’t get the picture that you are wearing fur…. But you should give us a picture of the final dress with the shoes..
Tanja
BTW: if you someday want to get rid of some shoes because they take too much place: I’ll be your friend 😉
Ha, ha! I’ll keep it in mind!
:- )
http://m.youtube.com/index?desktop_uri=%2F%3Fgl%3DDE%26hl%3Dde&hl=de&gl=DE#/watch?v=RzCGluwR8ew
Have a nice day, ENJOY the good-mood-dancing-song!
Dear Lisa.
Congratulations to your friend! Good choice!
They are beautiful boots.
I am a bit undecided between the black and red ……. I prefer the black! They go with everything 🙂
But the red, are so elegant. And those heels ……. They make me crazy. I love it too!!
Changing the subject.
You’re right. If you don’t have health, which is the most important thing in the world,
you have nothing. You can’t buy it. Unfortunately…
A big hug.
With love.
Nadia.
Oh my…..those boots are gorgeous!!! These boots are made for walking……..are they? Can you walk in them ? RESPECT! I can’t walk in high heels…I am clumsy and would trip a 1000 times haha
You are blessed with great friends! What your friend did is so sweet… 🙂
It’s so true what you said about enjoying and relaxing cause life is too short to be serious….although I went a little too far with that….you don’t wanna know how often I hear…”Ineke, when I first met you I never thought you were this crazy…… still don’t whether that is a compliment or not haha… I just like to have fun and laugh and act crazy but sometimes I do like to cry…..a lot. But I do that when it’s just me, myself and I.
Lisa, thank you so much for this wonderful blog…!
Xxx
Wow Lisa! I vote for the red ones. They just scream confidence and maybe a tiny bit of a devilish nature…you go girl and show ’em what you’re made of.
Ingrid
un enorme merci lisa pour partager cela avec nous
ce blog est super
chaque jour une pensé pour vous et patrick
amitié ♥
Hi Lisa
Dont know if you do what I do now, since my lose, I seem to cherish every single day now as I have found you need to as you just never know whats around the corner so I just take things one day a time life is more special and friends and family I find are also.
I try to make each day special if it,s just a lovely quiet walk with the dog Gilda I look around more enjoy my walks more the trees the wild life they all make you feel more at one with yourself give you kick to feel and see this lovely beautiful life.
It makes you feel alive , you sense so much more its an awakening inside you of feelings you never thought you had, but its a good feeling just thought I would share this with you God bless love Julie xxx
Hi Lisa,
I am so happy to have found your website! I just finished both your book and Patricks this weekend. I enjoyed them both. You are a beautiful writer!! I have to admit I have been feeling a bit blue since reading them. Cancer is so cruel! I admire you both for facing it with such dignity and grace. If I were in that situation, I see myself totally losing it and not strong enough to make it through. I’ve lost loved ones in my life and I know that something super natural kicks in and somehow pulls me through. But losing my husband or child is unimaginable to me. I’m so sorry you have had to experience this.
I have to say that reading your book has given me a “kick in the pants” reminder of how quickly things can change and how I need to appreciate and love what I have at this very moment. It’s so easy to get caught up in the daily tasks of life that you forget to really “live in the now”.
Another thing reading your books did was make me go to youtube and watch all the dance scenes from Dirty Dancing. I have always LOVED that show. Really, is there a man who could even come close to dancing as well as Patrick?? I think not!! I also saw the video of you all dancing together at the World Music Awards. So beautiful!!
I look forward to reading your blog and finding out how you are doing now. I wondered if you kept the ranch and still ride your horses and if you still fly your plane? My wish for you is that you have found some peace and joy in life again!
Blessings,
Shelley
Hey Lisa,
Those boots were like laying down a gauntlet to you. The challenge being, embrace the future and bring all your wonderful memories and experiences with you and leave sadness and pain in the past.
After all, YOUR life has changed (incredibly) but not ened. Good luck with that challenge.
Kate, Ireland.
PS, love the way your facebook page is growing so rapidly!!
Lisa, I just read your book cover to cover….one thought to put on your list of good thoughts is love transends time, space…….its a soul to soul connection. I was comforting my daughter after Patrick’s death and I told her that she is closer to Patrick now than she ever could be when he was on earth. Because now her soul can send all the love and light straight to him, Please keep making yourself do happy things – after my little girl stopped sobbing she said, “Beats a fan letter!” You will never, ever, ever know the thousands that think of you, and send positive messages of comfort t you. Wordless, silent, sincere love to your soul.
Don’t worry afout tears – when I lost my father in ’94 I cried rivers. He meant the world to me. After one good cry I felt as if I had put my grief in the dishwasjer ! Keep hanging in there – you are one Kick ^ss lady!
Love, Virginia & Ginny Anne
Hi Lisa,
I love this blog. Thanks for sharing…..I just got a pair of leopard print pumps, and I’m determined to put them on and go out and celebrate Mardi Gras. Nothing like a fun pair of shoes to spice life up with. Oh, also handbags, and sunglasses. They really can lift the spirits and make for wanting to go have fun!
Jill
Hi Lisa, my first post. Thank you for your book, I finished it last night, wept buckets, brought back lots of stuff from my husband’s illness and when he died. The picture of Patrick resting with the cat – he looked so like Tony that my heart skipped a beat. Patrick was a hero, as was Tony and, whilst I truly wish no-one else ever had to go through what we have gone through, it helps to know I am not alone. Bless you xxx
Dear Lisa,
I’m so happy to find you here and I’ll follow your website. And friends you’ve got here are very good (Hi everybody!)
Like Louboutin and Dujardin…I’m french, so excuse me for my unperfect english.
Last week, I saw Pina Bausch at TV and think you’ll enjoy her work.
Thank you Lisa,
Je vous embrasse tendrement
Clémentine
I wish there was a “Like” button for some of these comments! LOL Thank you Lisa, just for being you. For taking the time out of your life to write these blogs, and especially for writing Worth Fighting For. I just finished reading it. There are no words to describe how it moved me and made me feel so I’m not going to bother to try. Consider yourself hugged. A big bear hug!
I agree on wishing there was a “like” button. Whether they’re funny, interesting, or touching, these comments are the highlight of the blog!
“Like” 🙂
“Like” Lol
I agree! A “like” button would be perfect! 🙂
Lisa, I feel so close to you & Patrick. In 1964 I was 18 when I fell in love with my huband Bill. We married in 19 67 & had 43 wonderful years together. Bill was a 5th grade teacher, Elementary Assit. Principal & Principal. He devoted his life to his family, friends, students & staff. Bill worked for 36 years. Bill could have retired in 30 years. Bill loved his job so much he worked those extra 6 years. Melissa & Bill are our kids. Melissa is a first grade teacher. Wonder why? Our Son Bill is a Police Officer with Manassas City Police in Manassas, Va. We have 4 grand children. Bill died from this horrible beast 5/27/2010. He fought for 19 months. Bill was treated at Georgetown University Hospital in Washington, DC. Bill was my one & only in my life. I live in Culpepr, Va. I am so blessed that my children & grands also live in Culpeper. Their lives have not changed, except for the deep & horrible lost of their Dad. My life has changed completely. I know you know how much I miss my soul mate, his sense of humor & making me so mad I could choke him. Then the next minute making me laugh. We had our tough times. It wasn’t all love & laughter. I miss his smell, arguing, laughter, & everything he ever did for me. I had to learn how to put gas in the car, take trash out, vacumn, & empty the dishwasher. Do you think there is sex in HEAVEN? I sure hope so. I know Bill would not me to be depressed & sad all the time. I put my big girl pants on every morning, put one foot in front of the other & try every single day to go on without him. Hope I have not come on to strong. Me & my kids have read your book cover to cover. It was so inspiring to us. Sincerely, Pattie Hutchinson
My heart goes out to you. And yes, I know how life is so different without the one we love with us. It’s not just the big things, it’s all the little ones, too (and then some extra ones that have been thrown in just for good measure). Sometimes I wonder if I’m strong enough to tackle what’s put in front of me. Feels like the whole world has been dumped on top of me. But recently, that load has started to lighten a bit, and it makes me think…maybe all my hard work will actually pay off as time goes on. Seriously, I’m beginning to think that might be true. A nice a concept, huh? Best to you, L
I LIKE TO THINK OF LIFE AS A BALANCE,AND THAT NICE THINGS AND STUFF AND SHOPPING AND RETAIL THERAPY ETC, ARE JUST A PART OF THE EQUATION OF THE BALANCE. WHEN I HEAR PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT, THINGS SUCH AS , YOU DON’T NEED A MAN TO MAKE YOU HAPPY OR SHOPPING TO MAKE YOU HAPPY OR NICE CLOTHES TO MAKE YOU HAPPY OR NEW SHOES OR A NICE CAR ETC, MY EARS PRICK UP, BECAUSE I HAVE LEARNT MY LESSON, WHERE I ACTUALLY GOT MYSELF, BECAUSE I’VE SAID ALL THESE THINGS MYSELF BEFORE, AND WAS SO SURPRISED HOW I REACTED WHEN I GOT THESE THINGS!!!!! I CAUGHT MYSELF. !! I CAUGHT MYSELF OUT BECAUSE I WAS SO HAPPY WHEN I GOT EACH OF THESE THINGS. TRUE! BUT THEY WEREN’T EVERYTHING AND THEY DIDN’T REPLACE PEOPLE, BUT THE LESSON WAS, THEY HAVE THEIR PLACE IN THE BALANCE OF THINGS , AND A BALANCE IS HEALTHY. I LIKE THE SAYING – ALL WORK AND NO PLAY MAKES JACK A DULL BOY. JACK HAS NO BALANCE. THEIRS A TIME IN THE DAY TO EAT, TO SLEEP, TO WORK, TO TALK , TO HAVE A SHOWER , TO DRESS YOURSELF TO INTERACT WITH PEOPLE, TO COOK, TO CLEAN , TO SOCIALIZE TO SHOW LOVE TO OTHERS , TO REST AND RELAX. ONE NEEDS THE OTHER. I THINK YOUR FRIEND SHOWED YOU , YOU NEED THE BALANCE IN YOUR LIFE AND FOR US HUMANS TO OVER ANALYSE AND TRY TO EXTRACT PARTS OF LIFE THAT ARE REALLY PARTS OF OUR NATURE IS INTERFERING AND DISTURBING OUR BALANCED NATURE. LIKE TRYING TO TAKE THE FAT OUT OF OUR FOOD ; IT LOSES IT’S FLAVOUR, . SO IT DOESN’T WORK, YOU THEN NEED TO ADD MORE SALT OR SPICE OR SUGAR TO GET BACK THE FLAVOUR IN THE FOOD AND GET BACK THE BALANCE. WE NEED JOY IN OUR LIVES AND THINGS CAN BRING JOY. AND REMEMBER JOY IS GODLY!! HENCE THE SAYING IN A CHRISTMAS CAROL ”JOY TO THE WORLD ‘.. INSPIRATION ,CREATIVITY , INVENTIONS ,ARCHITECTURE, JET AEROPLANES BUILDINGS ,BRIDGES ALL COME FROM THE CREATIVE SIDE OF MANS NATURE. NICE THINGS AND MOVING FORWARD TO THE NEW AND SHOPPING AND BUYING IS A PART OF YOUR CREATIVITY, YOU JUST HAVE TO KEEP IT IN THE RIGHT BALANCE. I THINK YOU’LL FIND LISA, THAT WHAT WILL PULL YOU THROUGH IS , KEEPING YOUR LIFE IN BALANCE, AND NOT TO GO DOWN THE ISOLATED PATH OF STAYING AT HOME AND LETTING YOUR BEAUTIFUL SELF SLUMP IN A CHAIR FOR TOO LONG, MIND YOU I DO THINK YOU NEED TO DO A BIT OF THIS AS, IT’S PART OF THE PROCESS OF HEALING IS TO ALMOST SPACE OUT AND SLUMP AND BE PENSIVE FOR THE ONE YOU’VE LOST AS IT CAN REST YOUR SELF AND TAKE THE TIME TO GRIEVE AND SOAK IN THE PAIN AND FEELING ,AS RUNNING AWAY FROM IT IS NOT THE ANSWER. JUST REMEMBER THE WORD BALANCE. I THINK YOUR FRIENDS WON’T LET YOU WANDER TOO FAR FROM THIS WORD.. I’VE LOST PEOPLE I LOVE, TO DEATH AND ALSO JUST LOST THEM IN LIFE, AND WHAT I HAVE LEARNT IS TO NOT TRY TO GET OVER THEM AS YOU NEVER REALLY DO, JUST TRY TO DEAL WITH THE PAIN AND THE GRIEF AS IT EBBS AND FLOWS AND THAT GRIEF IS UNPREDICTABLE AND SOMETIMES NEVERENDING, SO I LEARNT TO LIVE WITH MY LOSS RATHER THAN TRYING TO GET OVER MY LOSS., AND IT TOOK A BIG BURDEN OFF THE EXTRA BURDEN WE PUT ON OURSELVES IN TRYING TO ” GET OVER ” SOMEONE. IT’S TOO HUGE A TASK AND IT’S UNREALISTIC. FROM KERYN
Hi Keryn. I like what you say in your comment, but it’s hard to read cause it’s soooo long. Try to shorten your comments to about 50%, and more people will be able to enjoy them. Thanx!
Hi Lisa,
I have wanted to contact you for a while but never quite knew how until now… I want to start by saying what thousands of people have communicated before me which is I am so sorry about your Buddy. On a more positive note I would like to also say how utterly amazing a lady you are, I have met you a few times over the years the most memorable time being when you were in town for The Mums the word premiere when I spent time with you both with the wonderful Margaret. Even then I had no idea just how amazing although your Buddy always raved about you… Now the world have an idea why! ;o) You guys as a couple were and still absolutely inspiring… I am so grateful to have met both Patrick this lovely lovely man of yours and you, being around you both was just breathtaking and the world lost a wonderful person when your love left this world… Lisa on a slightly more personal note I wrote a song when my father left this life many years ago and I would very much like to send it to you… Although the content is about loss I find a little comfort by listening to it and would like to share it with you if that would be ok? If so do you have a business add I could send it to? Anyway Lisa I think this comment is prob already a bit long so I shall finish up for now but you are always in my thoughts and in my prayers and much love from us all and keep kicking griefs butt! Joanna, Mark, Oliver Kostas and our newest addition, 2 month old Arianna Kimberley xxx
How thoughtful. Thank you. You can send it to my publicist:
WKTPR – Lisa Niemi Swayze
9350 Wilshire Blvd, Suite 450
Beverly Hills 90212
Attn. Allison
No problem Lisa although my husband just pointed out that I should explain why I refer to ‘oh baby’ rather than ‘oh daddy’ which is how I originally wrote it… Basically the company who were meant to promote the CD I did suggested that by changing to the words ‘oh baby’ that more people may be able to relate to it although now I don’t know if that is strictly true. Anyway once we get our new computer which should be this week, I will burn it to a CD and send it off to you with a note so you know it’s from me. I hope today is a good day for you much love Jo x
Dear Lisa,
I hope: You be very very happy! And very peace in your heart… And stay with Godness… Thank you so much for everything…
Lisa, please, your new book W.F.F… And The Time of my life (iss possible in portuguese?).Thank you so much and very very kisses in your heart…